New year, New me?

I really really hate seeing that quote. The beginning of this year I was on my old blog http://theblackandwhiteblog1.blogspot.com/ and I realized I've always enjoyed thought typing. What is thought typing you ask? Its just me, typing out my thoughts lol. The online scene is a scary place that can really make you feel like your thoughts could be crap or maybe you don't punctuate well or something is missing, which can lead to you not wanting to do it.

This year I want to start something new, I've always seen my mind as a whirlwind kind of place bursting with new ideas and new concepts but just like I share my highlight reel on Instagram, I kind of want my blog to be a behind the scenes of who I am and what I'm about. I know this type of blogging has phased out in some way because lets face it who even reads anymore? I am however doing this in some way for myself and in some way to help others. I've always enjoyed sharing my voice through youtube but I've always felt like immediately the camera was on me I had changed into this different person. My most pressing problem sometimes is capturing my essence on youtube. Anyway, I think it's safe to say that though I know not many people will take the time out to read this I will continue this because it helps me, and it may help someone else.

Today, January 17th mood: Uninspired. I woke up today thinking I was going to record a henna inspired makeup look but for some odd reason my mind combusted. I thought to myself what if it's not nice enough, or good enough or intricate enough? Here I go again, getting into my own head. All I'm thinking is how I haven't uploaded a youtube video in like a week and how inconsistent I'm becoming. However, also realizing that the quality of my life is becoming better which led me to realize everything in life is about balance. Last year I put work first, my work ethic was stellar however my personal life was making up for it.

With social media you have to be careful not to get so sucked in that you neglect your life or daily living, which is what i talked about in my recent video. Alot is going into this year for me, marriage, building a new home, being succesful all things I want so bad but I also need to focus on priorities. I think I'm a better "writer" (meaning someone who is writing, not that it's my profession or passion. I think I'm a better writer becuase sometimes when I speak I feel like my mouth moves faster than my brain, but for some odd reason I type at thie same speed my thoughts are moving, which is fun.

Anyway, that's about all for today, I feel less heavier now, which reminds me of why I loved typing out my thoughts. I will do this more often.

What are some struggles you guys are going through this first half of the year?

Aderonke Raji8 Comments